I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
Its like drunk me is Oprah except instead of a car everyone's award is seeing my boobs
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
Randomize
