Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
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