god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
With a stable of 7 fuck buddies, I literally use a random number generator to determine the order in which I will booty call them on my way home from work. I have not slept in my own bed in a month. I just keep half my clothes hanging in my car or in a suitcase.
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
Randomize
