I think scott just propositioned me for sex
Jesus wouldn't steal pop tarts. So why did you?
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
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