Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
We fucked for 9 months, but he didn't want anything serious. So, I got rid of him and went on a date with a guy last night that looks like Kylo Ren. Who's really winning here?
In hindsight, maybe rearranging his living room because he has OCD while he was out wasnt the greatest idea. Though it'll keep him busy for HOURS
Randomize
