im so horny i just used my electric toothbrush to masturbate. god help me
bouncer thought i was tryin to get the license plate numbers of strippers to stalk them. I had to go show him where I threw up to get back in.
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
