shit! I think I may have lost something in your car. Look for anything that can possibly belong to me, especially look out for a pair of pink panties in a ziplock. I lost my spare and you better find it before someone else does.
One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
Are my feet made of real feet?
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
I just want to make out with him forever
And my parents said I crawled through the house
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
how does that bad decision feel?
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
Randomize
