i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
He was having this drunk emotional breakdown and I was just trying to cheer him up but instead fell and dumped the whole pickle jar on me
It was cool though because he was fine afterwards and somehow I convinced them I did it on purpose...
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
So I had this brilliant idea that I would sleep in all sorts of sweatpants and sweatshirts... Apparently I thought I could "sweat" off the drunk in my sleep and that it would make me feel better when I woke up
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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