all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
Randomize
