at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
I have so many feelings about this burrito
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
Randomize
