my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
On my way to get pizza I followed a dog into Salvation Army where I was just hired
I'm pretty sure I imagined the dog... They still hired me
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
When are your genitals available?
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
Randomize