Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
We played Rock, Paper, Scissors last night to see who was the least drunk to drive.
The Rock won.
ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
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