everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
ps if your frozen peas taste like crotch it's because some dude kicked me in the nuts while trying to do a keg stand and I needed an ice pack
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
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