Three words: puerto rican gang bang
Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Randomize
