Just got booted from water taxi for showing my balls to a security guard.
my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
Apparently I told his new girlfriend to stop swallowing because she's getting fat. Oh, and I yelled this across a large room
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
Randomize