if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
sleeping like a two year old who chased ambien with a bottle of whiskey.
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
I think the multiple Sunday morning sirens outside my window are a plot by the cops to get back at me for the shit we pulled last night. Or I should move to a better area.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
After last night, I think I need a service animal to monitor the life choices I make when I'm inebriated. A monkey, or a clever dog. Or a really assertive parrot.
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
Randomize
