I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
Randomize
