Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
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