just come out here and I will go home with you...
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
My gut is currently telling me that Jesus did not intend for us to eat shrimp pad thai on Easter
Is this a considering it or regretting it text?
I just shit out what feels like an entire shrimp with claws and all. You tell me.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
Randomize
