I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
I'm at some bar in brklyn... just made out with a guy named Owen.
He is a pre-school teacher... just sang me a song about weather.
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
