thus making me awesome and them whores
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
He texts me "just to say hi" and then tells me how hard he is and sends me a dick pic. And I'm like, dude, I'm ordering a burrito right now
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
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