Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
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