What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
New guy at work just gave me a Percocet for my headache. Officially best friends
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
Randomize