the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
Randomize
