Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
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