If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
I'm about to initiate a game of drunk UNO.
Drunk UNO has officially been banned from now until forever.
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
Randomize
