dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
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