I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
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