Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
Randomize
