I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
it's a shame restraining orders have to come between me and my relationships
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
Randomize
