Pappa wants mamma naked
I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
I have two black x marks on my hands.
Yep you got cut off last night after a stripper bent over in front of you and you screamed very loudly 'I can see your soul from here'
damnit I wish I could remember that.
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
i love discovering the tokens of our drunkenness from the night before. it's like easter egg hunting. today: smashed pizza rolls in the sink.
Randomize
