Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
Just drunk tweeted NASA asking them to give me a lift home in one of their spaceships. Fingers crossed
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
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