he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
level of my singleness - just ate a whole pizza topless in bed.
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
Drinking heavily at 3pm and about to rescue a 30lb street turtle. Dont even bother attempting to rise to this level bitch
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
Randomize
