is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
Randomize