On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
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