Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
I'm going to start referring to my liver is Livy. I feel like if I give it an affectionate nickname it will hate me less. Livy isn't ready for syllabus week.
I think we all know your liver needs a man's name.
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
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