i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
My vibrator broke.
Dude it's been less than twelve hours. Did you sleep?
Don't worry about that. I need a new vibrator.
Randomize
