Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
It doesn't matter if I tell the story beginning to end or end to beginning, the story still starts with a random girl blowing me in the bathroom.
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Randomize
