is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
Omg. I'm living macklemores best life. I have someone's granddads dog, I'm about to have someone's grandmas car. I look incredible.
Randomize
