he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
Randomize
