i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Randomize
