I can't tonight. I'm still nursing a beach sex injury. Don't wanna talk about it.
u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
They are going to name an STD after you.
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
how drunk are you?
Several
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
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