this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize
