No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
Because when I say 'You shouldn't drink anymore', she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks'
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
Randomize
