Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
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