Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

Sorry dj_phuckit hasn't picked any favorites yet.

ADVERTISEMENT

(608): View more from Wisconsin

Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.

(1-608): View more from Wisconsin

Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.

Fav 40 5342 1370
share tweet
(262): View more from Wisconsin

The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks

Fav 25 6793 1420
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(405): View more from Oklahoma

Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me

Fav 19 5594 2123
share tweet
(513): View more from Ohio

This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.

Fav 5 3696 1154
share tweet
(832): View more from Houston, Texas

Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.

Fav 1 2339 862
share tweet
(647): View more from Ontario

Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.

Fav 5 736 1578
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(954): View more from Florida

I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.

Fav 1 691 1065
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(320): View more from Minnesota

It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.

Fav 1 1035 515
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(307): View more from Wyoming

Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!

Fav 2 58 24
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT