Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
When did we convert life to cartoon?
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
Randomize
