I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
Randomize