I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
Why does my car smell like burnt toast?
I take it you don't remember trying to make grilled cheese with your cigarette lighter...
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
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