How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
Hey I have your shoes. Do you remember shouting "Police brutality!" when the bouncer was kicking you out last night?
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
I just got into the cab. It smells like weed and the driver looks like someone who may or may not be really talented at playing the saxophone. He also asked me my thoughts on porn when I told him I'm an actor. I might not make it home.
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
A homeless man just offered me vodka. The power it took to deny it deserves an award.
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
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